Mama in Colour

Q & A With Erica + Sean

Filed Under: Life, Parenting // June 8, 2019

This has been a blog that I have been working on in my head for a really long time now and because this June marks seven years of Sean and I knowing each other (!!!), I figured that it would be a great time to finally get it all down.

I often get asked a lot of questions about our partnership and our marriage. I don't think this is because we are doing marriage better than anyone else, but I think people can feel the contentment that we have with one another. It isn't a front for the Internet; we actually really truly do like each other! I think that is an important distinction to make and once we dive deeper into this blog I think you will see why.

For folks that don't know the background into our story, let me start with that:

In 2012 a close offline friend of mine asked me to join a Facebook group that was geared towards "weird" black folks. She thought that I would enjoy connecting with some fellow black nerds. It wasn't a dating group and I absolutely wasn't looking for anything like that in my life anyhow.

Cue me joining the group and taking notice of this super cute guy who posted a lot and seemed really cool. Once again...I was totally not looking to date. I'd semi-recently gotten out of a 'situationship' and plus I was a single mom of a soon to be six year old (Nate of course!). My head space just wasn't there on that front, but something about him just kept making me notice him.

I soon found out that he was a musician who lived in Austin, Texas, and right then and there I fully admit that I generalized a little bit and assumed he must be a huge jerk who was running game on every woman in Austin.

I also soon found out that he was the polar opposite of that kind of guy, and that he was feeling drawn to me as well. We started texting in late June and talked on the phone for the first time on July 4th. I was still thinking this was super wild, but I also was feeling really happy and he was so friendly and easy to talk to. I came to look forward to his texts every day and worried that they would stop.

August rolled around and my life turned upside down. My aunt who raised me suddenly died from uterine cancer; we didn't even know she was sick until 48 hours before she died. I had to call an ambulance to our home (Nate and I had been living with her since my divorce from his dad) not knowing what was happening. The first person I called crying was Sean.

She died on August 17th, 2012. Several days later, Sean asked me if it would be okay to come visit. He knew how it sounded, that he was trying to take advantage of my grief, but he just felt a need to be here with me and sit with me in it.

I said yes, and to be honest the rest was history. From the moment he stepped off the plane and I saw him I knew he was my person.

It was a long couple of years to get to where we were at; we bridged the 1200 mile gap between us as often as we could. I'm not going to pretend like it was easy or wasn't often with tears and loneliness on both of our parts. On July 21st, 2014 Sean officially moved to Charlotte for good. We got married on December 6th, 2014.

We have been through a LOT in the last seven years; his move, our wedding, my miscarrying 20 days after our wedding, another miscarriage the next July, moving into a different home, job drama, and adding four cats and two babies to the mix.

Ultimately there is no one else I would rather have as my partner and best friend. Making the choice to do life with him every day, to raise our children, to love one another honestly and completely, is the best choice I could ever make.

Now that you all know a little about how we met, lets get into some of the questions! I crowd sourced a little bit along with taking into consideration the questions that I am generally asked and I compiled twelve of them that are kind of the 'most frequently' asked. I am going to give my answer, as well as Sean's so you have both perspectives. If you have anything else you would like to ask, feel free to leave a comment or send me an e-mail! <3

  • Have people been judgmental about you meeting on Facebook?

Erica: Not really! I won't lie, in the beginning I used to feel kind of weird mentioning it, but now in 2019 I don't at all. Folks are meeting people on dating apps and stuff all the time, so Facebook isn't too out of the ordinary I figure. Sometimes people look surprised, but that is about it. Also we ended up having mutual friends, so I for sure did my homework on him. šŸ˜‰

Sean: No, mainly for two reasons; one is that is it a lot more common than it used to be at the time. And in my own personal experience I had already met so many other people like friends, band mates, business associates on Facebook that in retrospect it was inevitable that I would meet the love of my life on the Internet.

  • What was the first, "If you're going to be with me you should know..." that you shared with each other?

Erica: For sure it was letting him know that if Nate didn't jibe with him, no matter how I felt about him we weren't going to be able to let this rock. I absolutely refused to put a relationship above my son and I would never have even casually dated someone that he didn't like or get along with. When Sean first came to Charlotte, I made the decision to let Nate meet him just to see how it was and even then he met Sean as a friend and not my boyfriend; we did not get affectionate in front of him. It was an immediate connection on both of their ends, which made the decision to pursue a relationship with Sean such a natural decision. To this day, Nate absolutely loves Sean and sees him as his second father.

Sean: Aside from my identity as a musician, there was no essential fact about me that I needed her to know and accept as a non-negotiable thing. What I most wanted Erica to know was that I am a real person and a loving person and that I was looking for the same.

  • Is there anything that the other person does that is super minuscule but huge to you that lets you know they love you?

Erica: I love how no matter what he texts me when he gets to work and texts me when he is on his way home. With the way my anxiety is set up, I tend to go into weird doomsday places if I don't know hes gotten to work okay or if he has left to come home. I love how he doesn't try to make me feel like something is wrong with me because of those things, he does them because he know it is important to me.

Sean: She lets me rant and rave about Guided by Voices without making me feel like a big dork! Everyone has a thing that makes them feel really excited, and I know in so many relationships that one person frowns on the other person's interest and is very vocal and public about their disinterest. It matters when you care enough about the other person's interests enough to be excited with them. It doesn't mean you have to go as hard as they do, but you enjoy it by proxy because they do and you love them.

  • Any tips on keeping the magic alive after kids?

Erica: It might sound silly to some, but we always stay connected. Like we will post funny memes on each other’s Facebook wall or text inside jokes. I love that we can laugh together and I find that super sexy. I think sometimes people get caught up in sparks having to be overtly romantic or sexual but if you are connecting with each other and always staying in communication? For me that totally makes the sparks happen for sure. It especially helps when you really don’t have a lot of time because life is busy and you have kids. Just send a funny or sweet text. Share a funny meme. Don’t worry about what romance ā€˜should’ look like. It might not even look like this for you! Just do what works for you and your spouse.

Sean: We never really ever stop talking to each other. A lot of the things that we did at the beginning of our relationship we still do now. The methods and timing may be different because we have kids now so it’s get it in where we can fit it in. We kept doing it so the spark never got lost because someone is always fanning the flame.

  • How does Sean help you cope with postpartum anxiety?

Erica: As someone who already had Generalized Anxiety Disorder before I experienced PPA, I feel as though he already was good at noticing my cues for when I was feeling really out of sorts. PPA though really threw me for a whole loop, and everything was magnified so much. It helped to know that there was something that I could be honest about what was happening in my mind, and would not shun me but encourage me and stand by my side. I truly don't know if I would still be here if it wasn't for how he was there for me during those dark days.

Sean: Some of it is just listening and recognizing that as hard and frequently irrational as anxiety seems, it’s always rooted in something. You have to be understanding of that. You have to acknowledge what could go wrong and what also is going right. And also just being around and being gentle, keeping her engaged when she wants to be engaged, and giving her space when she needs it.

  • Do you ever disagree on stuff? How do you handle it?

Erica: It sounds strange and probably like a load of crap, but we don’t actually disagree often. That isn’t to say that we think the exact same or do things the same way, but we both give each other the grace to be understanding if we don’t agree. Neither of us are folks that are into confrontation for confrontations sake, but at the same time neither of us are afraid of it. We just talk stuff out.

Sean: I’m sure we do disagree on stuff, but it tends to be minor stuff that Erica ends up being right about anyway, so I just go with it.

  • How do you have me time?

Erica: I make a point to ask for it and carve it out. We loosely have a schedule for each evening on who is working on their projects and when it is time for family and we don’t focus on whatever we are both working on. I am someone who very much needs alone time to recharge and I don’t feel guilty about asking for it. I also think it helps because Sean is truly an equal in parenting. He doesn’t ā€˜baby sit’ the kids and I don’t need nor want to micromanage him as a parent. He is just as capable as I am. Except when it comes to breastfeeding! šŸ˜›

Sean: It takes lots of scheduling and compromise. Let’s face it; if you are in a household where you are equally parenting three kids and two of them are babies, it’s virtually impossible for it to happen organically. A lot of the time when I do have me time, I almost immediately want to return to the family anyway.

  • Where do your parenting styles diverge and how do you approach negotiating that?

Erica: I feel as though our parenting styles are very similar and there aren’t any differences that are glaringly apparent. I think ironically enough Sean is a bit more cautious of a parent than I am but that isn’t really a huge difference. The fundamental values about how we want to raise the kids at the same so if there was a difference about say...when we wanted to sign one up for a lesson or what time to go to bed, we would discuss it and work together to come up with a solution that is best for the kids.

Sean: They don’t really diverge because we have the same kind of goals about how we want to raise our children and what kind of people we hope for them to be.

  • What is the easiest part of your relationship? The most difficult?

Erica: I feel like the easiest part is the fact that Sean is genuinely someone that I like and that I respect. I would want to be his friends even if he was not my spouse. The hardest part really isn’t about him or our relationship, it’s just managing all of the outside stress, like job stress or money stress. We really work hard to make sure that we are a team and take on the hard stuff together rather than against each other.

Sean: The easiest part of our relationship is coming back home. Also the most important part, the communication. Because I feel loved and supported in this relationship as my whole true self, then I can express what I think and feel to Erica without reservations and hopefully vice versa. The hardest thing is managing professional and financial stress, though thankfully it isn’t as much now as it has been in prior years.

  • What advice do you have for other blended families?

Erica: As a single mom when I started dating Sean, I would say really vet whomever you want to introduce as a partner into your child’s life. I know a lot of folks say that kids shouldn’t ā€˜run your life’ but that isn’t how I choose to look at it. I wouldn’t want anyone in my child’s life that I didn’t feel like would be a good fit or someone that I didn’t feel like would be someone that would be there for the long term. Take as long as you need to figure that out; if they are really worth it, they will stick around for the long haul. Also take things slow when it comes to building relationships between kids and a partner. Sean and Nate really did bond very quickly and naturally but Sean didn’t press it or overstep his bounds when it came to the relationship. I think Nate felt that.

Sean: Always focus on what is best for the children, because as tough as it can be for adults to navigate new and complex situations, it’s even more so for children. Do whatever you can to make the children feel as loved and comfortable as possible, even if it means sacrificing your own ego or your own feelings.

  • What do you like the best about each other?

Erica: So many people tell me all the time that he is the best man they know, and it really is true. He has a pureness to his spirit that is really lovely and he is so easy to get along with. Everything he does is with caring and concern for the people that he loves. Also he is the best father in the world.

Sean: I like the fact that she is actually loving; she truly does care about people and it isn’t in a Pollyanna way that doesn’t see people’s weaknesses or doesn’t check people when they need to be checked. There is no abuse or martyrdom, there is just genuine care and concern for the people she loves. Her friendships are real and her love is real. She gives the kind of love that she wants to receive and it shows in our marriage, our children, and her friendships. And that she extends that love to herself because I know that has been a process.

  • When did you know that you wanted to get married?

Erica: It came honestly as a shock to me that I wanted to because I really didn’t want to get married again after my divorce. I wasn’t opposed to a long term relationship but the idea of marriage was scary. I think I realized pretty soon that with Sean I could have the kind of marriage that I really wanted, one built on mutual respect and love. That’s when I let him know what I would be open to the idea (because I had told him originally I didn’t want to, and he respected that though I knew he wanted to)!

Sean: When I first met Nate and I started building a Lego set with him. I knew before then but once that happened I knew that it was possible. It felt like the last puzzle piece was put into place.

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Hello There!

I'm Erica Alayne Padilla (they/them), but you can call me Layne, and Mama in Colour is my space to wax poetic about all the things that I am passionate about. There is always going to be a little fashion, a little parenting, a whole lot of social justice and opinions on various things, about my experience as a non-binary human, and whatever else is on my brain. I am mama to three beautiful and brilliant children and spouse to an amazing man. I'm an ardent lover of coffee, cardigans, and unironically watching basically every show on Bravo. I hope you pull up a chair and decide to stay awhile. <3

xoxo, L

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LP ✨
Part of my journey with my body is to jump out of Part of my journey with my body is to jump out of my comfort zone. Even when it feels silly or uncomfortable; maybe even ESPECIALLY when it feels that way. For me it’s about getting out of my head about the size of my body and just living my life freely and unabashedly. I turned 40 a few months ago and I spent too much of my first 40 years letting ideas about my body hold me back and I don’t want to spend the next 40 years in that mindset. So it’s all about having fun, being silly, dancing when I feel like it, and covering my body with things that make me feel good. ⁣
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Thank you to @thirdlove for #gifting me their iconic 24/7 Classic T Shirt Bra because it certainly makes me feel that way! It features their signature memory foam cups which form to your unique shape, so you get a comfortable and smooth fit. I am super picky about bras (y’all know I am primarily a bralette type of person) and the comfort and style of this one can’t be beat and is for sure going in my bra rotation. šŸ’œā£
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#ThirdLovePartner #MyThirdLove
Today marks ten years since Trayvon Martin was mur Today marks ten years since Trayvon Martin was murdered. Ten years in which a 17 year old kid would have grown into a now 27 year old adult. ⁣
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Sometimes the question of what ā€˜radicalized’ you comes up, and I can say absolutely with my whole heart his death and the aftermath of that is what changed me. It’s what compelled me to never be silent, to keep fighting, to not be complacent. A lifetime of masking my feelings and pain when it came to racism and injustice opened up inside of me and I was to never be the same. ⁣
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And frankly? I don’t WANT to be the same. ⁣
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I look back at the last ten years, and I see how little we have truly learned and changed on the whole, and it angers me but I also take that anger to keep up the fight. To keep speaking out, no matter how many people try to silence me, hop in my DMs thinking they are hurting me, no matter how scared I feel. ⁣
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I do it for and because of Trayvon. ⁣
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A child who’s name I should never have known. ⁣
Main Character Energy. āš”ļøāœØā£ ⁣ #mainchara Main Character Energy. āš”ļøāœØā£
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#maincharacterenergy #f21xme #streetstyleinspo #allblackeverything #androgynousstyle #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
My three year old took this photo. He has started My three year old took this photo. He has started wanting to take my phone so he can ā€œdo a pictureā€ as he calls it and this was from this morning. I messed with the color on it simply because I wanted to, but the framing and the photo is all him. It is so fun to see our kids cultivate talents at things they love. I won’t even lie, it is shocking to see how good his photos have been but at the same time I tell myself that kids are constantly doing pretty cool things, you have have to take the time to really pay attention. ⁣
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So this is a little sign this Monday to really look at your kids and what they love, no matter how young they are. If they love drawing, taking photos, music, whatever it may be; encourage that love and allow them to explore and discover and find what makes them tick. ⁣
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#raisingtoddlers #respectfulparenting #attachmentparenting #gentleparenting #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
While I appreciate people who have perfect feeds a While I appreciate people who have perfect feeds and beautiful aesthetics and a neutral vibe, I have to keep it real; that just isn’t me. And you know what? THAT IS OKAY!⁣
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It’s easy for a lot of people to get caught up in what they see on these apps and think somehow someone else’s vibe is ā€˜better’ or ā€˜prettier’ than theirs, but that really isn’t rooted in truth. Nothing is more beautiful than being who you are. You can appreciate what others bring to the table without it being your style or it taking shine off of yours. ⁣
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And for ME? That is fun and kind of trippy edits, colors, interesting graphics, just using this medium as one big art project. Is that for everyone? No way! And that’s super cool with me because I love my vibe and that’s what truly matters. ⁣
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Life is too short to not lean into who you are, especially on social media. ✨⁣
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P.S. This flawless coverall is going to be coming down the pipe soon from @wearewildfang! I’ll let y’all know when it drops and thanks to the Wildfang crew for #gifting it to me, I love it so much. šŸ’œā£
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#unapologeticallyme #acolorstory #genderneutral #genderneutralclothing #wearewildfang #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
There was no time for cute new photos or a fancy d There was no time for cute new photos or a fancy dinner or flowers or chocolate (neither which I actually like anyway!) but enough about what there isn’t and more on what there is; no matter what, there is companionship, trust, understanding, laugher, and a whole lot of love. That is so valuable and I am so glad that we choose to do life together. ⁣
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This sort of holiday is polarizing with a lot of folks and I get that but I also learned from Sean (because this is legit his fave holiday) that there is nothing wrong with having a day to be especially sweet to the people you love. And that doesn’t have to be a partner; that’s friends, family, and especially yourself. ⁣
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So cheers to love in our lives in whatever form it may come because they are all important and worthy of celebration. ā¤ļøā£
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#valentinesday #blacklove #blackmarriage #selflove #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
✨ TW: past disordered eating/orthorexia ✨⁣
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Gone are the days that I agonize over every bite of food I put in my mouth. ⁣
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Gone are the days where I count calories and fat grams and think about how much exercise it’s going to take to work off a meal or a snack or a stick of gum or a mint. ⁣
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Gone are the days where I focus so deeply on projecting ā€˜health’ and believing the lie that being thin is the only way to look healthy. ⁣
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Gone are the days where I put my worth into if I am ā€˜healthy’ or not because health isn’t an indicator of if I am worthy of being treated like a human being. ⁣
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And though those days have been gone, I am painfully aware of how they could creep up out of no where and take over my brain again. ⁣
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Because those things are an addiction. ⁣
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And I was an addict. ⁣
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I was addicted to the control, addicted to the messages I was taught that fat is bad, addicted to wanting so desperately for someone to notice I was slowly slipping away. ⁣
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And I’ll spend every day of the rest of my life keeping myself in a state of recovery. ⁣
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#eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorderwarrior #orthorexiarecovery #justeatthemeal #fatpositive #bodyneutrality #bodyneutral #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
I am a lot happier on this app without the pressur I am a lot happier on this app without the pressure to post. The pressure to have some kind of post every day, to say something witty or profound, to be seen so hopefully I’ll get noticed by brands so I can work even though I have always taken jobs on my own terms. Now I just exist as I want. I haven’t posted on my feed in a week because I simply didn’t have anything to say. I have been so immersed in my death doula training as well, which if you watch my stories or follow me on my page for that (@queencitydeathdoula) you know that it’s changed my life completely and I know for sure I have found my calling. ⁣
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It feels freeing to just be. If I want to post once a week, I will. If I want to post three times a day, I will. My bank account is sure smaller without getting many influencer job offers anymore or actively hustling to get them, but my heart is bigger, growing, glowing, feeling, all the things. And while I’m not going to say that losing income is worth it because my family is the working poor and statements like that frankly are for people with no money issues (which we have) or that I’ll never take another influencer job again, I feel like I’m where I need to be and whatever opportunity is next will happen. ⁣
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#nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
Just a reminder to my Black non-binary, gender non Just a reminder to my Black non-binary, gender non-conforming, and trans folks in particular as well as my Black folks that are a part of the LGBTQ+ community on the whole:
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This #blackhistorymonth don’t forget that you yourself are Black History. ⁣
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And it isn’t about your accomplishments, being part of LLC Twitter (IYKYK), what your degree is or how much money you make, or if you are lauded on the internet. It’s about every day that you make the choice to get out of bed. It’s about every day that you are still here, even when sometimes it’s feels too hard to be. It’s about existing in a world that doesn’t ā€˜get it’ and is already a hard walk because of the truth of systemic racism, but you live with even further marginalization. It’s about the fact that you are actively choosing day by day, minute by minute, even second by second, to simply exist. And to maybe flourish, maybe thrive, but don’t lose sight that just EXISTING is worthy of praise. ⁣
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I’m proud of you all. ⁣
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And I’m proud of me too. ⁣
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With All My Love,⁣
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Your non-binary queer Mama, L ✨⁣
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#iamblackhistory #blackhistory #bhm #blacklivesmatter #youareblackhistory#blacktranslivesmatter #blackandlgbtq #oneofthem #blackandnonbinary #blackandtrans #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
I said what I said and I mean what I say. ⁣ ⁣ I said what I said and I mean what I say. ⁣
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If there is any place within a movement for symbols of hate or a comparison to the civil rights movement or the Holocaust? It’s racist. It’s anti-semitic. ⁣
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And as you have the ā€˜freedom’ to make that choice to be a part of something like that? I and others have the ā€˜freedom’ to say we think it’s trash. ⁣
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I am actually pretty grateful I have seen some people come out in support of all of this because it’s let me know that for me, they are not safe people and not people I need in my life. Keep that honesty coming. I am sure there will be more because things like this empower folks to let their true colors show. ⁣
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Racism and anti-semitism isn’t just an American problem; it’s global.
Folks have this misconception sometimes that margi Folks have this misconception sometimes that marginalized people always want to be ā€˜understood’, so said marginalized people are supposed to just put up with whatever in the name of being understood. ⁣
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Can I let you in on a secret that pertains to me?⁣
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I don’t give a crap if people understand me. ⁣
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I’m not going to turn myself inside out in the hopes people can understand my life. I am all for people who want to have a respectful discussion with me, but my goal in life isn’t to do a bunch of emotional labor so people that are determined to believe that something is wrong about me can magically somehow ā€˜get it’. ⁣
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Get it, or don’t. Like me, or don’t. Want to learn, or don’t. That isn’t on me and isn’t my focus. I’m not a textbook or a search engine. I don’t make my life centered around understanding and approval from other people, beloveds. ⁣
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#nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary  #blackandnonbinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
This is me last night as I was about to start my p This is me last night as I was about to start my pre-work for the end of life doula courses that I will be starting the first week of February through @inelda_doulas. This process of starting this journey has been a few years in the making and I am so happy to be starting it with a program that is focused on equity and inclusivity. My greatest dream with this journey is to be able to serve marginalized communities and provide the dying with guidance, love, support, and most of all compassion. ⁣
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I have never felt so called to do something in my life and to be in my 40th year of life, finally walking in my purpose, is beyond any words I have. šŸ’œā£
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#deathworker #deathdoula #deathmidwife #deathisnottaboo #endoflifedoula #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
Caturday ✨⁣ ⁣ #lazysaturday #catsofinstagram Caturday ✨⁣
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#lazysaturday #catsofinstagram #caturday #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
We got snow again and everyone in the house is asl We got snow again and everyone in the house is asleep but me, so I went outside alone to enjoy the stillness and breathe it in. It was glorious. It was good to have that moment alone, with myself, by myself, with nothing but magic and quiet around me. Pure bliss just exactly when I needed it. ⁣
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And I know the snow and cold isn’t everyone’s scene, and that’s fine of course; but it’s mine and this was a precious moment so please don’t rain (or should I say snow? šŸ˜†) on my moment simply because you’d prefer something different. That’s the beauty of life, we can all find magic in different things. ⁣
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#snowstorm #carolinasnow #charlottenc #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
ā€œSome days are good; some days are not so good. ā€œSome days are good; some days are not so good. Some days are really exciting. Some days are just tedious. You just have to get up out of bed.ā€ - AndrĆ© Leon Talley šŸ–¤ā£
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#andreleontalley #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
Here is something to share so y’all can stop man Here is something to share so y’all can stop manipulating quotes from MLK to fit in with your narrative. Read these words and let them sink in, and consider your role in 2022 in being anti-racist. We are looking for accomplices, not allies. ⁣
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Black folks have been weary of the last couple of years. Where ā€˜BLM’ was considered a trend and then was cast aside when it felt too uncomfortable and hard to keep the work up.⁣
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Take this day to actually dig deep and choose if you are just going to share tired whitewashed quotes, or are you actually going to do the work. And then DO THE WORK. Don’t tell us about what your plan is, don’t expect cookies and high fives. ⁣
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Just. Do. The. Work. ⁣
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Let that speak for you. ⁣
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#mlkday #mlkquote #blacklivesmatter #stopkillingus #antiracist #accomplice #nonbinary #nonbinarymama #beyondthebinary #nonbinaryblogger #nonbinarymotherhood #spreadblackjoy #blackenbymagic #blackmamas #bohomama #mamalife #witchymama #mamaofthree #motherhoodthroughig #motherhoodunfiltered #documentingmotherhood #momentsinmotherhood  #thisismotherhood #charlottebloggers #mamablogger #holdontohope #mamaincolour
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